Have you visited a Christian bookstore lately?
     I went to one of the many in Dallas a few weeks ago. I wanted to see if our magazine, The Wittenburg Door, had been released from the magazine purgatory that we were assigned almost a decade ago for naming Beavis and Butthead "Theologians of the Decade."
     The Door wasn't available in the store, not even in a plain brown paper wrap under the checkout counter. But there were plenty of other items to choose from.
     Every Christian bookstore or website has a section dubbed "Christian retail."
     There you can find things like the Jesus Christ T-Shirt. With the Savior's name emblazoned boldly in the (probably copyrighted) Coca Cola font, this shirt is "Eternally Refreshing! This tee is a bright reminder of God's thirst-quenching love! Features scripture from John 4:14."
     Next are the Resurrection Eggs, a seasonal favorite with the kiddies. Each colored plastic Easter egg contains a tiny toy representing some element from the crucifixion.
     What is this saying, really? The Passion of the Missing Yolk?
     Prominantly displayed in the book section was the best-seller Your Best Life Now by Joel Osteen. The promotional text says, "Osteen continues his mission to help others to go higher, rise above obstacles, and live in health, abundance, and victory. Also available: Your Best Life Now Journal—The ultimate tool to help you achieve lifelong happiness—and Daily Readings from Your Best Life Now."
     Not offered is Your Life Would Be $45 Better If You Hadn't Purchased These Books.
     In the mood for a Christian horror novel? I mean, besides Osteen's book? Try House by Frank Peretti. The author of This Present Darkness, who hasn't had a big seller lately, presents a tale in which "two couples in rural Alabama, who are running from a maniac bent on killing them, flee deep into the woods and seek refuge in a house."
     Isn't that always a tremendously Bad Idea?
     "They soon realize the killer has purposely lured them to this house and that they are now trapped. Imagine their horror when their tormentor turns out to be James Dobson."
     Uh, that last part is untrue, but it might actually improve the premise.
     Don't even get me started on the Christian romance novels. But the teen girl readership seems to be a hot market demographic right now.
     Look at Mean Girls by Haley Dimarco: "Many will say that all girls are basically mean. This one-of-a-kind book can help end the cycle of meanness."
     END THE CYCLE OF MEANNESS! Surely that's something eveyone can support.
     And you can buy its sequel, Mean Girls Gone Wild, which takes "a closer look at what God has to say about the mean girls we encounter every day, including the one in the mirror."
     But, hey, if you read Osteen's book, he "believes fervently that our self-image should mirror exactly what God says about us, not what we feel or think."
     OK, then. Didn't God say that all those mean girls and endlessly striving, goal-oriented guys died with Christ on the cross? So how can a dead person need a how-to book to improve?
     Actually, every book in the store seemed to be a "how to" problem-solving manual. How to pray, how to have a happy marriage, how to raise godly children, how to be healed and of course an avalanche of how-to-be-prosperous volumes.
     You may not have noticed, but this is one of my pet peeves.
     The dominant takeaway from my conversion experience was that I could never again help myself. For me, doing anything to benefit me amounted to a denial of the faith.
     As a new believer, I visited close to 100 churches over a period of three years trying to find a church. At every one I visited, the preacher, pastor, teacher or discussion leader would be telling us how to get something from God.
     As soon as any "how to" was taught or preached, the nausea came.
     I didn't need to know how to get. I had been doing that all my life. I needed to learn how to give, how to die to myself.
     The religious leaders I encountered seemed to be teaching that faith was a commodity to get something from God. But the scriptures I was reading said things like, "Now we are complete in Him. By one offering we have been perfected forever. Christ in you, the (only) hope of glory. The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. It is the Father's good pleasure to give you all things freely."
     If seen correctly, the greatest enemies of mercy and grace are cause and effect and reward and punishment—the basic elements of a "how-to" book—because they take us away from the childlike dependence on the Father that the scriptures describe.
     I saw this vividly in 1976 after writing a book called Crossfire.
     The publisher asked me to attend the Christian Booksellers Association annual convention in Atlantic City. I was to be one of their authors manning a booth, talking about my book and signing autographs.
     As soon as I entered the convention hall, I felt the familiar nausea returning.
     Thousands of people were milling around with something to sell, trying to entice other people who came because they believed they needed more than they had.
     I made it to the booth and tried to do what the publisher asked, but the atmosphere was stifling and I couldn't breathe.
     It seemed as though I was being smothered in "how-to's."
     Could this be Babylon?
     Much to the chagrin of the publisher, I left without signing one book.

Ole's morning bible study is available here.